weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Girls should come with a carfax report
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
