If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Randomize
