My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
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