My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Randomize
