Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
id be glad to
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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