it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I will pee on everything he values.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
