Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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