The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize