I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize