She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
