I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
