Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Randomize