I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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