my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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