It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize