He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
