We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
