No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Randomize
