so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
You need a sexual gate keeper
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Randomize