I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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