Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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