community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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