Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
