Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
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