So drunk, too bad you don't want this
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
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Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize