you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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