he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
