Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
What changed your mind?
Being sober
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
