Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
it glows. i had to have it.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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