talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
40s are totally the cure
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
