Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I booty called her while she was in labor.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
