what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I am mentally ready for anal.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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