Fine. I'll sleep in my office
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
