I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
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