I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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