Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Randomize
