She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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