She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
