I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
we're making bets on your personal life
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
