i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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