guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize