Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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