Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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