I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Green mimosas i think yes
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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