No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
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