Ambien. No doubt about it.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
