She's JV to your varsity
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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