Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
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