Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize