Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Randomize
