My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Randomize
